Those little worries

At the tail end of the last post I mentioned 'not worrying about trifles'. But of course you do.

I think I make a serious point when I assert that as you grow older little things bear down on you harder. I have several things on my mind just now, none of them particularly bad, but taken together they nag at my peace of mind. And yet you might call them trifles. Here are just the three main ones:

# I've now had Fiona's worn-out transmission problems fixed, but the coming year will see new things arising: (a) an expensive annual service in May, including a main-drivebelt change (it happens every 108,000 miles, and that point is approaching fast); (b) replacement of the rear brake disks and pads, likely on past form to be necessary sometime this year; and (c) the likely replacement of the exhaust system, which has lasted seven years intact but must surely start disintegrating soon. I have the money in place for all of this. So it is sorted. But what else might crop up?

# The back garden is starting to awake from its winter slumber. Last autumn Kevin next door and myself cleared the garden edges of unwanted shrubs and a mass of undergrowth, but soon I must have those parts dug over and leveled, so that I can extend the lawn sideways. Expense and effort. Can I get it organised? Can I find the cash for hired equipment, and a skip? I can't expect Kevin to do it all, so will I have enough personal muscle power - and stamina?

# The front and rear lawns will need regular mowing. But my mower man has just retired, and won't be available. I'll need to find another person at a price I can afford. And who will now trim my big rear hedge? I don't see myself doing any of this.

The issue of sheer physical strength feeds my gardening concerns big time. It's all very well losing weight and gaining slimness and better health, but it seems to have reduced my muscles as well. Not that I ever had a lot of muscle; but when I look at my slender arms nowadays I do wonder how on earth I am going to wield a spade to any great effect. Or control some machine. The notion of weight-training in a gym is abhorrent. I am going to be dependant on one or more strong men. Sigh.

The smallest thing is likely to seem a big problem, if I let it. A couple of posts ago I related how I fixed my printer. It was simplicity itself, once I had faced the crisis, researched what to do, and got on with it. But I almost let it get me down.

I think I am much worse now at taking things in my stride than I used to be. But maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I have always worried a lot, when faced with something I don't know the answer to. And yet most often I have found a way. Or time will resolve it. Or somebody has a bright idea I haven't thought of, and the way forward is suddenly easy and obvious. So really on past experience I shouldn't be worrying at all.

The long and short of it is that very few problems are insurmountable, and if they are, then I can take decisions and adopt a new course entirely. I keep on celebrating my independence and very high degree of personal control, with nobody to say 'no' to me. I should regard that as an asset, a reassurance that I have freedom of action, and can never get totally stuck.